What's your why (part 3-ish)

Until we see what we are, we cannot take steps to become what we should be


One of the subjects I keep coming back to again and again in my own head is my “what's my why?”.

For the last few months I’ve been contemplating this one single question in the periphery of my mind and it has opened me up in ways I wasn't aware was happening. It's almost like, because I opened up the portal so to speak, my brain has been attuned to picking up ALL the signals and hits that were coming to it over time. 

And I have to tell you this is coming at a great time in my business life as I push into high gear for the launch of my new course, Dubsado For Coaches

(y’all I'm so flipping excited about it I could break out in dance at the prospect of releasing it. I even created a new blog to talk about it over here if you wanna take a peak)

But back to my why.

For the past 8 years I’ve started off my year with a Word of the Year (WOTY). To get this worh, in the last few months before a new year begins a jumble of words make their way to me and, like a juggler, I keep tossing them up over and over to see if they fit, discarding those that don't feel right or pertinent to where I am in my life and in my business. 

I remember the year “holding space" chose me. I fought, I mean I fought real hard at not having it be my WOTY. Because why??? It was a phrase and not a single word (duh!!)

Yeh, my perfectionism took over that year but my WOTY was absolutely relentless! It would not leave me alone....kept showing up in books or blog posts I was reading, in friend's IG feeds and even in the words I was hearing spoken to or around me. 

The Universe was sure doing her job and giving me a clue but I wasn't buying it. Cause it was a flipping phrase y'all! I mean really!!!!!

But, after much resistance I finally embraced it and went into the year ready for whatever was to come. And, my intuition was so right. It's what I needed that year to hold space for what was to come, almost like gearing myself up for all the future had planned for me.   

This year, in 2018, the word that chose me was “Show up”.  I didn’t hesitate to embrace it. All of it. Why? Because of my previous experience yes, but also because I knew this key thing, I was playing small. I knew that I was tucked up in the corner of my shell staying in that comfort zone space I'd created oh so long ago to keep me safe.

But what I soon realized was that it was time.  

So all throughout the year I've let my WOTY, "Show up" guide me into be more present either virtually or in person, doing those things I dared not do and creating courses and content that engaged AND empowered me but especially the women I wanted to help.

Now don't get me wrong, I have always tried to do that, be present, but it's amazing how hard the steering is from the flipping back seat. Can't possible move your life forward if you're not front and center, right?

So I showed up again and again and again, even when my scared little girl self was telling me we can’t; even though my FEAR was screaming at me to stop; especially when my inner critic put on her best scary voice to intimidate me into shutting it all down (cause she's bat sh*t crazy like that!), I showed up and.....


Even with all of that making me want to run for my comfort place, with my Why? pushing at the door, wanting to come in, trying to countermand all that extraneous noise, my heart, my inner divine, my intuition KEPT saying YES. Do it! 

(read in this post about how this 2018's WOTY showed up) 

It's when we allow space for ourselves to be more present, however it shows up that brilliant things get manifested….including a new why. 

Because I've been allowing things to percolate (seems like for-evahhh) instead of forcing an answer, the other day on my morning walk a big “ding, ding, ding!” occurred (it's always a podcast when I'm walking or in the shower, both times when I have no paper at hand to scribble some notes dang it!).

My soul’s purpose is to help creatives. . . 

in particular women, and help them discover who they are and find their JOY. You know, a soul nudger. That one foundational purpose hasn't changed. 

What I know right now after all this introspection is that the bigger purpose is larger than I ever thought. Obviously my head nor my mind was not ready to receive it….until now. Ya think?!

 But more about that later. This post is already way too long. Stay tuned for more about this journey of mine into my Why?. 

My question for you is...

What's YOUR why?

What's the thing that continues to light you up every dang time you think about it? That specific one thing that gets to the core of who you are as a person and as a woman. What's that one thing that opens you up and let's you be you, all in?

And who would you be with this thing, this 'why you do what you do' showing up in your life? Who indeed!

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not saying your why can only lead to doing one specific thing or talking about one specific topic. If you are a multi-passionate, one thing ain't your bag. I get that.

Your "why?" informs ALL things you go after. 

I came up with 3 questions that I asked in a recent IGTV video I posted on my Instagram feed to help you figure out your "Why?". Click the IGTV button in the upper left under my profile info to take a quick listen.

Ok I'm off. Next time, what I discovered and now know without a doubt about my own "Why?".




*quote by Charlotte Gilman